Theres another consideration. Is your partner still in contact with the elderly family member? Research suggests that the infection fatality rate is hundreds of times as high among people over 65 as it is among those under 35. Its probably best, then, if your partner doesnt visit this elderly relative until after being away from campus for a while.
As for you and your partner, the question is whether each of you has been able to exercise the individual precautions that can prevent exposure. If youve conscientiously done so, theres no reason you cant get together. Hospital workers still come home to loved ones, after all. Even in situations that pose risk of exposure, the correct protocols, correctly performed, can keep us relatively safe.
A friend of my sons says she is being physically and emotionally abused by her parents. She doesnt want Child Protective Services involved, because she fears that her much younger sibling would grow up in foster care. My son is asking if we can shelter this girl while she hides from her parents until later this year, when she turns 18. Is being a runaway (and staying with my family or another) better than foster care or abuse, if those are her options? I have no legal way to protect her. And if Im being honest, I find myself balking at the thought of hiding a child from her parents, even though the child is being hurt. I can keep her safe for a short time, but then what?
I dont know the girl or her parents at all. Name Withheld
Lets assume that the account provided by your sons friend is accurate and that whats going on would indeed lead Child Protective Services to conclude that she was being raised by unfit parents. The first thing to discuss with her is why she nonetheless considers her parents to be fit parents for her younger sibling. Even if youre convinced that shes right about this, you might still think that C.P.S. would be best suited to make this assessment. Nor do you have to be a lawyer to wonder how wise it is to have someone elses minor child come live with you without parental consent. There are organizations that specialize in looking after runaway (and thrown-away) teenagers and may have experience in dealing with the issues here. Id help her contact one of them.
My nephew has four children with two women, one of whom he lives with. He has no contact with the two oldest children aside from the court-mandated payments he sporadically makes. Although the nephew has a full-time job, the two mothers qualify for, and use, federal assistance. The family has talked to them, kindly, about the long-term cost of children and the importance of birth control. It falls on deaf ears. The two contact me only when they need money. They often ask other family members for money too. I live on a strict fixed income, but I dont want the children to suffer, so Ive provided occasional diapers, formula and cash. The most recent baby, in my mind, is the straw that broke the camels back. I feel that the familys providing them money or baby supplies has left them with a false sense that they can afford more children. I feel so sorry for the kids, but I dont think I can keep giving them money or supplies. Is this OK? Name Withheld
There are times when helping someone in a bad situation encourages people to put others in that bad situation. (You pay ransom to save the hostage at the cost of encouraging further hostage-taking.)
People shouldnt have children on the assumption that they may impose the costs of their offsprings maintenance on others. Youre morally free, then, to forgo providing assistance, especially given that you have limited resources. Theres a slight chance that these parents will take the familys message seriously if theyre warned that assistance beyond that provided by the state can no longer be taken for granted if they have more children. You and your kin might want to make this clear. And please urge your nephew to take his legal obligations seriously too.read more
As a University Spokesman, Can I Promote a Reopening Plan I Question?
