There was a point during the first lockdown, when Id daydream about becoming a yes man. Id think to myself: I got too sucked into the rat race, man. If this thing has taught me anything, its that life is about experiences. Ive spent too much time on my phone. As soon as Im able to Ill say yes to that bungee jump. Ill say yes to that National Trust dry-stone walling course. Life is lived on the margins so Ill take up kickboxing and enter a dialogue with pain.
As you can imagine, this nettlegrasping lasted about 30 seconds into restrictions being lifted (realistically, why would I want to learn a skill thats mainly relevant in the Peak District or get my head kicked off my body?), but the one thing I have approached with renewed vigour is football.
As I walked to the away end at the Madejski Stadium on Tuesday night, for a fixture that would stir the blood of any football fan (Reading v Swansea City in the first round of the Carabao Cup), I adopted the traditional football fans strut, a walk reserved exclusively for attending games and one so purposeful it would look insane at soft play or if you were buying a pot plant from Homebase.
I hadnt been to a football match since the Swans lost 1-0 against Fulham at Craven Cottage in February 2020, and as I walked to the ground I experienced the same sharpening of the senses I have felt at every sporting event since I began attending games in 1988. I looked up at our fans, singing YOUR SUPPORT, YOUR SUPPORT, YOUR SUPPORT IS FUCKING SHIT! and with contented sigh thought: Aaah this feels like home. Our supporters sang a sarcastic version of Three Lions (with occasional cartoon blubbing gestures), Reading fans responded with a lusty rendition of God Save The Queen and sang that we wished we were Eng-er-lish, to which we did wanker signs. It truly is the beautiful game.
Matchday behaviour felt like easing into an old pair of slippers. I hadnt signified an opposition miss with outstretched arms for 16 months, but it all came back, a comforting muscle memory. Those outstretched arms combined with ironic cheer were effortless, like an old heavyweight world champion shadow boxing on a chat show, 40 years after they were last king of the ring. It felt good to boo a Reading players every touch for 30 minutes, despite missing the original transgression because I was Googling Swanseas Jake Bidwell to see how many caps he got for England Under19s (3). I loved shouting USE IT, a sentence which under careful examination is revealed to mean absolutely nothing.
For Swanseas second goal, a Ben Cabango header midway through the second half, I became momentarily senseless, leaving my seat to run down the stairs towards the advertising hoardings, before thinking: Youre 41 in November and Reading have seven teenagers in their side because of a transfer embargo, is this reasonable?
I love the first week of the new season because, unless your club is very unlucky, things havent gone wrong yet. My enthusiasm was helped by Readings weakened team of course, but watching your side cruise to a 3-0 win on a warm summers evening can have an absurd impact on your expectation levels. It was only Russell Martins second game in charge of Swansea, so it was nice to see his new ideas unfold, shakily at times like a baby deer taking its first steps (thankfully wild animals only have predators to contend with during these crucial first few hours, and not men in replica shirts shouting WANKER! WANKER! WANKER!). It was interesting to get a feel for how our fans see Martins appointment, but in person and away from the distorting environment of social media.
Ben Cabangos goal for Swansea momentarily sent Elis James senseless. Photograph: Athena Pictures/Getty Images
Oddly for a club that has spent the majority of my lifetime in the lower divisions, a significant proportion of our supporters value an attractive playing style over success. Do fans of other clubs say things such as, I can handle us losing and finishing in mid-table if we play the right way? It might have been a representative sample of the six or seven people I talked to at full-time, but Swanseas reputation for having a fanbase that values aesthetic, progressive, and entertaining football over almost everything else was borne out by the conversations I had on Tuesday.
The fans of most Championship clubs value hard work, effort, and success on the pitch. We have slightly loftier ambitions in our part of South Wales. Despite reaching two consecutive play-offs, Steve Coopers style of play was never universally popular among Swansea supporters, a difficult thing for people unconnected to the club to imagine. But Ive met older fans who reminisce about the attractive football the club played in the 1950s, before Swansea had city status and when the BBC could make the April Fools joke that spaghetti grew on trees in Switzerland believable to millions. The Swansea Way goes back further than Roberto Martínezs appointment in 2007 for some of our fans. It predates BBC Two.
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As Readings teenagers were swept aside by a Swansea team that played like 1982 Brazil, I was sore from my own footballing exploits, having played that afternoon. Ive loved playing since I was very young, occupying that middle ground of being on a totally different planet to a professional but garnering enough experience over the past 35 years to look fairly competent on the condition that Im put under absolutely zero pressure. (I probably look my best during the 10 minutes or so before the game starts, idly kicking the ball into the net as the other players do those stretches that were discredited in the 1980s and talk about their weekends.) But even a kickabout now feels magical.
Swansea had around 860 fans at Reading, so the concourses were uncrowded and the stand felt safe. For thousands of vulnerable fans this isnt the case, but the option for supporters to watch 3pm kickoffs on iFollow or their club-hosted alternative has been withdrawn by the EFL, claiming its to protect attendances and the interests of their broadcast partners, which feels deeply unfair at a time when so many still feel uneasy. Playing football outdoors feels safe. Bungee jumping can wait, but playing and watching football were a normal part of my routine until last year. I will never take them for granted again.read more
Going to my first Swansea match in 16 months renewed my appetite for football | Elis James
